the Climb

Now i'm not a miley cyrus fan or anything.. but i do appreciate a lot of what this song is saying. right now i have deep personal problems.. and every day feels like the biggest uphill battle to stay positive and smile and pretend that everything is ok. it isn't, but it will be.. tho perhaps not for a while.

in the mean time, all i can do is fight the good fight and be strong for myself because nobody can do that for me. luckily, i have the boys of 2pm and 2am to keep my spirits off and take my mind off my own life. yay for the simple joys and distractions of life. <3

NSU

What a ride it has been... 4 years went by in the quickest of flashes and I find myself having just returned from my last NSU event. Banquet was beautiful and I was so proud of all of my New Staff bebes. I didn't cry at the event though, it just seemed so surreal... We got our sashes, had our senior skits and slide shows, and i freakin got staffer of the year!!!! :O z'ooooomg.

i don't even have the brain power right now to make this even vaguely eloquent, but the highest praise of the night came from my other half:

i'm really proud of you Vanessa
you made an impact and influence on all of their lives
we all talk about craig
but they will all talk about you

i could not have received a more gracious compliment =]

wei shen me

i am getting the crap kicked out of me by life. In every single facet and sphere of my life, i am getting the stuffing knocked out of me.

it just hasn't been my quarter to catch a break. sigh.

tokidoki

sometimes i worry that i might fall for you again.

waking-up

i guess i knew there would be a day coming soon when i would wake-up and realize that nothing had ever been real.

Optimism

How optimistic are you allowed to be before you are considered blind and unrealistic?

Despite all that has happened and the way that it all turned out.. i can't help but feel a little positive, as if there is still a very small ray of hope shining on me from behind a sky that is otherwise filled with gloom and doom.

i can't help but feel that at the end of the day, everything will work out the way that it is supposed to.. and who knows, it might turn out better than i could ever have expected it would.

Overtime, I can only hope that my small ray of sunshine will grow bigger until it overtakes the clouds in the sky and it becomes a beautiful day.

good advice to live by.

"its also good you guys arent rushing into anything because that tends to lead to doom"

short, sweet, simple and to the point. haha